15 years of player hating*
15 lessons for democracy**
Hello darlings –
Well, somehow it has been 15 years (today!) since I defended my dissertation! That’s shocking to me because I have no fucking idea what I’m doing and I’ve been doing it for this long?!? WHAT. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT THIS STILL??
* if you get this reference, then you too are an “old” but at least a kind of cool one?
** all opinions my own and do not reflect my employer, the state of Texas, or the United States of America
I have been thinking about the ways that being in academia (and maybe just being in life?) apply to fighting for democracy. Here are my 15 lessons:
It will be really hard. Keep going.
This job (of being an academic / saving democracy) is hard! If it was easy, everyone would do it! It would be like being a DJ – everyone would try it out for a while. It isn’t. That doesn’t mean that it isn’t worth doing. Accept the suck and know that you are capable of this work. Keep going.
Some moments will feel like you are living in a fake reality. Remember to laugh about it.
A colleague calling economy class “steerage” in a faculty meeting // an 18 year old asking you out on a date // a group chat between the foreign policy apparatus and the editor of the Atlantic // rate my professor // purple capes // evil rich people // stupid loser men.
It’s all dumb. It IS funny. Don’t let the fucking sour mouths of the world tell you that laughing isn’t a weapon.
People will tell you that you can’t change anything. They are lying.
People lie. All the time. About everything. But especially about your own agency. About your ability to choose the life you want, the government you want, the representatives you want. They are lying to you because they don’t have the bravery to imagine a better world.
You will get lots of bad advice, ignore it
SO MUCH BAD ADVICE. (says the advice columnist) (my advice is also bad!) Be careful who you trust, who you listen to, and evaluate people’s claims against the evidence.
You will get lots of good advice, take it
There’s a lot of great information out there from people who have already made all the mistakes you are about to make. Why don’t you listen to them about how to make your life better? About how to make the world better?
Success looks like failure for 1000 times (until it doesn’t)
Sometimes this job / fighting for democracy feels like running head first into a wall over and over and over and over again. Until the wall cracks. It seems like the dumbest shit ever – running into the wall over and over again. Marching over and over. Calling over and over. Until it isn’t.
Know your strengths, build them
Don’t do this imposter syndrome bullshit about “oh I don’t have strengths I don’t know…” Stop crying and figure out what you are good at. Cultivate those skills. Invest in them. Grow stronger. Gnash your teeth. Terrify your enemies.
Know your weaknesses, diminish them
Know what your weaknesses are and confront them. Know the traps. Know the things that will demobilize you for days / weeks / months. Avoid them. Train yourself to get around them.
Get therapy
Like, seriously. For this job and this life and this fucking democracy.
Distractions are everywhere
Especially right now. The stupid important shit is totally mixed in with the stupid unimportant shit in a giant pot of shit soup. Figure out ways of dealing with all of it. I told some folks recently that I give myself a 30 minute panic hour where I learn everything that’s wrong with the world today. Do what you need to do to survive this hellscape (both the job and the world)
Connections will be the difference between winning and losing
Build community, learn from it, give to it, expect nothing back but gain everything.
Take a chance
Stop playing safe. With your ideas, your teaching, your research, your fight for democracy. (This is absolutely a note to myself)
Burn shit down
Figuratively, of course.
Plan for losing
What will it look like if you don’t get the job? Elections aren’t held? The book isn’t done? There’s no social security? The article is rejected? Bank accounts are frozen? Tenure is denied? Borders close? What are the concrete plans you have for personal and national failure?
Plan for winning
What will it look like if you do succeed? If we pull ourselves back from the brink? If we get another chance? And another one? And another one? What will you do then? How will you rise?
XOXOX
Mirya